Sep
04
Even though it’s Saturday night and the city is crowded with awesome events, I will stay at home. Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to just shut the world out and relax. The past two days has been very intense in terms of emotional stress, and now when I have finally sorted everything out and feel great, all I want to do is to be alone with my own peaceful mind.
Yesterday I had the unavoidable first real crises with my boyfriend wich almost lead to us breaking up. He was upset about me prioritizing my friends above him since I have been back, which is partly true. Another thing that came up in the discussion was a significant cultural issue. The fact that I have many male friends is very hard for a Korean boyfriend to understand, as it is deeply rooted in their traditional culture to only have close friends of the same sex. In my own feminist influenced Swedish culture, on the other hand, jealousy because of a ‘minor detail’ like sexes is not considered fully acceptable. I have however taken his very accepting mind for granted when he has not ever made this opinion of his an issue before. We both told each other our honest minds and what was bugging us, which first resulted in the heated discussion and then lead to the realization that nothing really matters except that we love each other.
But to sum it all up, our fight – or rather discussion, ended in the best way it could have. Neither of us had to back down from our own point of view, and we both came out of this battle with even more sincere feelings and more trust. I have been pretty restless about the fact that he is going to the army, just like those of you who has read my recent posts probably know. I have now decided to just forget about that and devote myself more to this relationship. I realized that I have been afraid of falling too deep in love with him, as I have had the thought of us sooner or later breaking up in the back of my head this entire time. Now I know I would rather promise to wait for him for two years, than to end it with him.
After this emotional rollercoaster we were both just crazier in love than ever before. So we went all in, and got dressed up, had a bottle of soju and then we went to Club answer – the romantic (not) location we first met in. We got really drunk and had fun, clinging to each other’s hands, kissing and dancing. I don’t remember anything other than that he was by my side all night, and it was not because of the alcohol.
If it doesn’t kill it, it only makes it stronger.
Sep
02
The Korea Times writes,
“Typhoon Kompasu struck central South Korea early Thursday morning, bringing downpours and gusts that paralyzed metro operations in Seoul and adjacent areas. With almost all above-ground sections of Seoul’s subway lines out of service, street trees toppled and winds blowing at a speed of over 20 meters per second, commuters and students were forced to undergo the worst transportation chaos in decades. The typhoon caused power outages along the west coast and forced airlines to cancel or divert domestic and international flights. Kompasu is the strongest tropical storm to hit Seoul in 15 years.”
I remember waking up this morning thinking “wow it’s really windy outside” and then just falling right back to sleep. I had no idea that there was a Typhoon coming. Everything seems to be back to normal now anyways, so don’t worry mom 
Aug
08
When people ask me what it is about Seoul that I miss so much, I usually can’t answer very well. I know I had made this comparison before, but it’s the same feeling as when someone asks why you love someone. The answer is I miss everything, and yet nothing in particular. There are, however, some things I miss more than others when being away from Korea.
While being in little quiet Sweden I have come to miss the never ending buzz of the city that never sleeps. And it’s not just the young crowd that is seen around town in the middle of the night – it is people of all ages. I have been living alone for a long time in my apartment here in Stockholm before going to Korea, and I really usually love the quiet peaceful setting. But the unexpected emptiness from suddenly not being surrounded by people all the time has been overwhelming. Even though I am sure it’s just temporary, and a result from not realizing that also moving back somewhere requires adjustment, I have been feeling a bit lost in my own hometown. That’s a sad reality in itself.
In Seoul I always have someone that I can call, regardless of it being an important matter or not, any time of the day. The clubs are amazing. The shopping is amazing. Doing nothing at all is amazing. Restaurants are opened (what feels like) all the time, so it’s never hard to find a late night snack. The constant city-noise is something that slowly has grown on me from something quite annoying that I’ve learned to accept, to something comforting and homely. Coming away from it all at times too is ince though. Biking in the silence by the Hankang, watching the distant city lights reflecting in the river or going to a jimjilbang (public bath) and just relax in the saunas or hot pools.
I miss Korean food and everything that goes with it; side dishes, kimchi and the polite table manners that comes naturally for all Koreans. I find myself doing the hand-under-arm gesture still, even when paying at McDonald’s, as well as turning my head away when drinking. Just to be able to go down the street from wherever you live and find all things you might be craving for within five minutes is great – weather its Korean food or western food.
I am not saying that life is better in a big city, but city-life definitely is. With infinite opportunities of activities and everything accessible to you from an arm-length distance it is hard to get bored. I guess that is why so many people get sucked in to city life. I never quite understood it before, but it is like being a child in a toy store and then suddenly having to leave.
Aug
07
I have a goal with my video blog project. It’s not just the random bad video making it is at the moment – I am still practicing. I am still working out what kind of style and technique I should use. I like the crappy quality – it makes it more genuine and honest. My goal is to make daily video clips of stuff that people want to see; stuff that concerns them who live in South Korea and in Seoul especially, as well as things that might be interesting for foreigners to know. When I started making it I had in mind to make it in a similar way that I write my blogs; personal and important. But I have changed my mind and am now aspiring to make them more entertaining. Out on the streets I want to interview people in Seoul about all kinds of things that pop into my head. I will have three standard video topics that will return each week. One will be about fashion and is going to show cool outfits of street style that I have captured on film throughout the week, as well as shopping etc. One will be about night- and social life, such as hanging out with friends or going to some kind of event. And one will be about stuff that Korea is famous for regarding culture, history and tradition as well as modern characteristics. I want to introduce the country to all my family and friends at home.
But that is only for the vlog part. It is supposed to be fun and entertaining. But actually my plan is to; quite frankly, use my vlog as a tool for attracting more readers to my blog. At the moment I have more readers than I thought I would when I started writing it, which is amazing. Among other things my blog is a combination of two favorite hobbies – writing and thinking. There are so many bloggers out there, and there is not one single blog that I follow (as I don’t like reading in general), but I know one thing: Many bloggers write about stupid stuff. Diversity in blogs is obviously a positive thing as so many people have an opportunity to find reading material that is in the exact category of subjects they are interested in. However, it does bug me that so many writers, and celebrities none the less, does not use their position of influence in a better way. The internet is an amazing tool to spread information, and is why it originally was invented. My ultimate goal with my blog is to write about important stuff. Not important as in “boring-important”, but important as in “stuff people would like to know”. Although I have studied various subjects of importance at university, I think that it suits another blog better to deal with politics, economy, feminism, animal rights and natural disasters. I am more concerned with issues that are more close to home and more individual; building one’s self esteem, finding out the meaning with life and being happy and at peace with oneself.
Of course I also do my blog and vlog for my own personal interests, and probably mostly for that. However, it has always bugged me that people who have the power to influence people beyond their circle of acquaintances, don’t use it. As I have readers who I have never met I will try to do my best in writing about stuff that I’ve always thought someone ought to write about. After all, I think that solving issues within oneself and being genuinly happy with whatever kind of life one lives, is the most important factor in creating a peaceful society.
/Woori Paula
Aug
06
I failed several things today. Picking up a package from the post office was one of them. It contained all my books and clothes that I sent from Korea and was approximately 13 kilos; which is a few more kilos than my skinny yoga arms can carry. Another thing was buying kimchi that I needed to make a complete hansik dish. I just couldn’t find it – Swedish supermarkets need to globalize! The kimbap rolls that I bravely attempted to create were far beyond the ugliness that I anticipated, but were still delicious so, I guess that was partly a success. I made a fun video of the making process too. That failed as I had technical errors blocking my creativity. I hate Windows movie maker.
Later, when giving up the video making for the moment, I met up with my friend J. We tried to see a good movie and ended up going around the whole city in search for one we wanted to see. That failed and we ended up seeing another. It was ok; but just “ok”.
On my way home I stopped my bike on a high bridge and looked out over the darkened city. It was beautiful, and I thought how stupid I was for thinking that the day was such a failure. After all, while biking around in the sunset together with my friend we had so much fun, chatting and laughing. We also went past the city center where some kind of rock festival was going on. There was many people and cool music, so we stopped and hung out for a bit. Isn’t it stupid to focus on ones failures when there is great quality time to treasure in between them? After all, I didn’t meet my friend to see a movie – I saw a movie because I wanted to meet my friend.
Further more – how would anyone know success if they didn’t know failure?
/woori – paula
Aug
05
It’s my little sister’s birthday today. I had problems with figuring out what to buy for her. It is always hard to give a gift to someone you love, because there is no thing that is ever comparable to how you feel about the person.
However, I think this is even more difficult for people with never-ending creditcards who are used to being able to buy whatever they want. I think that often leads to people forgetting that there are things that money can’t buy. Of course that sounds quite obvious, but many people, don’t realize the difference between a happy look on someone’s face when receiving an expensive present and a genuine happy feeling within. Even sadder is the fact that I think many people start forgetting the difference, even when it comes to themselves. If people start thinking that the cost of the present mesures the effection the person giving it feels, then I think our economic growth in the world has gone in the wrong direction. I am not poor, nor am I rich. I think that I have just the right amount to appriciate all I have. I never spend much money on the people I love; I find it unnecessary when I might as well tell them instead. I too, would rather have effection and time with my friends and boyfriend than anything money can buy.
In the end it turnes out my sister was very happy with all her presents, but still seemed most happy about spending an afternoon together with our family, eating cake and looking at pictures from when we were young.
Aug
02
Finally I finished the first VLOG video! Yesterday was living hell for me when I had to learn the hard way that Windows Movie Maker sucks, and that there is one MAJOR warning that the program does not tell you about. It’s the fact that even if you “save” your project that you are working on, you should NOT close the window until you are COMPLETELY done with the movie and have “publish”-ed it. I was cutting and editing, and making yesterday’s version of the video (that I posted today), for hours while learning about the program. Then I had to do it all over again today. Therefore it is not very well made and has spelling misstakes and stuff… Anyways, enough about that. Like my mother said on the phone: “Well, now you know not to make that mistake again.”
I am so happy though, that I finally started this project. I hope you guys will follow it and subscribe to my YouTube channel!
http://www.youtube.com/NoonaVLOG
Jul
25
I have been quite depressed recently to be honest. Before leaving Korea I had no idea that returning would be such a challenge. If I would have known it would have been this hard, I could have put more efforts into finding a job while I was there. The main difficulty is thus work related. Or rater – it’s a visa issue. An easy way for a foreigner to work abroad is to teach English, and that would have been a perfect job for me in Seoul. The problem is that in Korea, regardless of the applicant’s English skills, she needs to be a native English speaker and have a passport from Australia, America, England or South Africa. And since I am Swedish, that is not an option for me.
After some research I have found that my only chance of obtaining a working VISA is if a Korean corporation would hire me. And because I don’t speak Korean, that is quite unlikely. However, I have always been lucky so I have not yet lost all faith. But, it is quite a depressive reality I am in right now. I don’t quite know what to do. Luckily my boyfriend’s English is not good enough to be reading this. He would be very upset if he knew that I don’t know when, if at all, I can return to Korea.
Jul
21
In elementary school art was my best subject and in middle school I was mostly fucused on my after school activities. In high school I was studying criminology, human behaviour and philosophy. After school I travelled, worked part time jobs and started teaching yoga. The next step that felt just as natural for me as for my academic family was to study at university. So I did. For about four years. I have a degree now, which is a mix of everything that can seem to be important knowledge, although I strongly doubt I will ever work with anything I will need this degree for.
While being quite clueless about the next path of my life, I found a new existence in Korea. I love my life in Seoul to the extent that nothing else seems to matter at the moment more than for me to be able to live there for a while. In this much unplanned stage of my life, where I am not doing much more productive things than blog all day, I have started to realize something that has never occurred to me before. That all I want is to write.
Jul
18
I have given it some thought and I’ve come to the conclution to do it. Vlogging. I have, however, not yet decided on how. It is possible to do it with a web cam, and I probably will, as that is all I am in posession of at the moment. I also should concentrate on what it is that I am good at, instead of trying to copy other successful vloggers. I will not try to deliver the joke of the day or tell people how to dress, nor will I make each episode into a little movie as that is far beyond my technical skills. I have some ideas about how i will do it and probably will get started around next week – even if I am not back in Seoul yet. So, before that, if anyone has some great ideas – please share!
I hope you’ll enjoy it!
